A few summers ago, Jerome’s mom (M) and stepdad (S) came to visit.*
Somehow S had heard of a restaurant in Seattle that he decided he wanted to go to even though no one else did. Anchovies and Olives. M pointed out that she doesn’t eat sea food. I’m not a huge fan of most seafood either. Didn’t matter! We all ended up there anyway. I hoped they had some sort of chicken dish as most places do for the odd one out in the group.
When we got there, we were seated and given menus. The waiter was snooty from the very start. He asked for drink orders. S got a beer, M got a Diet Coke, I asked for iced tea and was told they don’t have ANY tea (he wasn’t nice about saying that either…like ordering tea was a personal insult.)…I ended up with a Diet Coke as well; and I forget what Jerome asked for originally, but he ended up with ‘lemonade’. …more on the drinks in a minute.
S is looking over the menu happily by this time. I was disappointed to find they had no chicken dish…or any other non-seafood dish. The only thing that looked remotely appetizing was the most expensive thing on the menu. Jerome discreetly agreed with me. (And he likes most seafood!).
I was nervously contemplating what to do. M announced that she refused to eat anything there. I was tempted to do the same, but I didn’t want to be rude. The only other times I’d refused to eat at restaurants were when I was anorexic still and for the most part, I didn’t know it was rude.
The drinks came. M and I were each given a glass with ice and a mini bottle of Diet Coke. The soda was flat. Before we could flag down the waiter again to tell him, we figured out that our tiny bottles were over a year past their use by dates. Jerome’s ‘lemonade’ had pretty much no sugar in it. S was happy with his beer.
When the waiter came back, it was also a personal insult that we complained about flat, old soda. He gave us new tiny bottles (They were also flat and old.) S ignored our obvious dislike and ordered like 15 raw oysters and some bread. (Bread, by the way, COSTS EXTRA!)
I can’t do raw oysters. I tried once. Nope. Just nope. Jerome had a few, though. Tried the bread. Stale.
While they were oystering I quietly decided to get a salad. It had endive and soft boiled egg and some sorta fish…I honestly forget now.** Jerome got the same thing. I forget what S got.
The salad was so bitter I had a hard time keeping a straight face. It was the dressing, I tried to keep away from it…but it was tossed in well. I think I gagged once or twice. Thank god I’ve learned how to do that without attracting attention. I got through what I could.
When we finally got out of there, Jerome voiced his opinion about the whole thing. I don’t remember what he said, it amounted to “That was awful!” M and I heartily agreed. S got pissed and wouldn’t talk to us for the rest of the trip.
Anchovies and Olives is supposed to be a really nice place to go. Most people give it glowing reviews! The few that I found that didn’t like it seemed to agree completely with me.
*Those are really their first initials, I’m not abbreviating mom and stepdad. That amused me, though.
**I looked up the menu to try to remind myself, but it’s changed. Surprisingly, more things look good now…but I will never go back.
P.S. Jerome came in in the middle of typing this, glanced at it and said, “Yep, that’s the best story for this theme. NEVER AGAIN!”